Generally speaking, most people share a desire to be good.

For many of us though, being a good person means being there for everything and everyone. Sometimes this behaviour can go to extremes, where people start to deny their own needs in order to help others. They are constantly preoccupied about what others think and feel, always fearful of saying no & setting limits, apologizing for things that are not their fault, and hungry for the approval of others.

Those who fall into the ‘yes’ camp will go above and beyond to make sure their friends, families and colleagues are satisfied – even if it means putting themselves last. People pleasing is a self-protection strategy that we learn in our early years, particularly when we want to avoid criticism and conflict.

This need to please others can also come down to a lack of self-worth. The truth is, most of us know if we are a people pleaser or not.

People pleasing can look like a good thing, but using it as a way of coping with everyday life can come at a cost. You can feel resentful, overloaded, and overwhelmed. You become disconnected from your own needs and wants – constantly feeling inner pain for supressing your authentic self for so long.

This week look for patterns in your people-pleaser behavior. There may be people that you feel more of a compulsion to try and satisfy. Your actions may be a way to recover from the hurt they caused you in the past. 

Start recognizing your limits and placing boundaries around how you spend your time. Think about how much energy you really have before making commitments. Try to expend your energy only on those things that align with your values and make you feel good. Most importantly, give yourself permission to say NO.

You deserve to receive your own Love that you so freely give to others.